Self Study~In my old studio stating the obvious
Seems that in my current financial situation, I have sadly fallen into the tragic stereo type of the artist…straight-up broke, eatin dry bread sandwiches and one cent short of a penny but oh so prolific in my studio work and fully invested in the business of my art, luckily for me inspiration is always free!
The other day as I was “cleaning up” my studio that tragically is beginning to look like a cross between Francis Bacon’s studio and an episode of Hoarders. In this clean-up I found a file of old essays that I wrote back in 2007 while I was stuck in my 4th floor walk-up with a broken foot, broken by the way, 5 hours before my flight from India back to Brooklyn. Anywhoo, I found these two paragraphs from my 2007 essay entitled The Journey that made me laugh and I though it an interesting window into the loopy mind of the artist, well into the loopy mind of me, and it went like this.
“ The older I get, the more crazy, twisted, self loathing, and angry I become.
What a freakin head case! I always said that I would never have a painter as a boyfriend because male painters unlike we female painters are completely unhinged. Umhmm.
Truth is, the boys ain’t no different from the girls. We are all crazy-assed,
motha-@!cking pigment pushers with more emotion than sense. We live wide open, feeling every dang thing from the sound of a dew drop or a gun shot to the tsunami happening 10 years from now on the other side of the earth.
At different moments we think that we are both Christ and anti-Christ,
that we are beyond redemption and think that nothing can save us but the process. Trifling! As my friend R always says "u a pain in yo own ass". True...so true. We are all Unhinged! Both atheist and devout believer we are always looking for some form of catharsis, an epiphany or some form of redemption. Really, who can keep up with all that? No one wants to ride on this long assed crazy-train. Well some do, you masochists know who you are, bless your sweet hearts. So for all of you art-lovers out there, I’ve been thinking of starting a dating web site for artists, I’de call it Creative People Meet and my profile page would read something like this: Extremely talented, self employed slightly unhinged 40 something Jamaican artist with a broke foot, and broke with one cent short of a penny, prone to bouts of uncontrolled laughter and sarcasm, battling nicotine addiction, and who hasn’t had a good lay in over a decade, looking for
the perfect man ~ painters need not apply.”
I am interested to know how your profile page would read on my new (make-believe) artist dating web site tentatively called
Creative People Meet, feel free to post them in the comments section.
Remember folks, laughter is the answer, and laughter is sweet!!
Peace ya’ll! P